Trust the Light.

Sometimes when I pray all I want to do is talk. Chat, yell, cry. All of it, all at once sometimes. I need to get everything I need and want and hope and dread all out in the open because, even though the Lord knows it all, I just have to vent.

But then there are those times when all I need to do is sit in silence and listen. Those are moments I treasure.

Those are the moments when the rush of the world is outside of me and my worries are not swirling in my head. Those are the moments when all I want to do is just be with Him and bask in His everlasting, perfect mercy. I yearn to trust Him wholly and give my entire self to Him in those moments. There is no fear there. Oh, how I wish I could be in that place at all times, always giving Him my "yes" even when it is so tempting to deny Him like St. Peter did that somber Friday morning once upon a time.

I so often falter. I so often choose to be bound by fear. I so often deny His Love.

You see, friends, however painful submitting to fear may be, it is familiar. It is predictable. It is easy. It is safe.

But in the end, no one wants a "love" like that. No one wants a "love" with limits. No one wants the enemy of love - fear. But why do we choose it so often?

I think we choose it because real, authentic Love is dangerous. His Love does not bend under the weight of fear no matter how excruciating it is to Love us when we do not return or even respond to His perfect Love. His Love bleeds as he pours out His Divine Mercy on us so we might know healing and wholeness. His Love is everything He is. No conditions and no exceptions. He does not take. He only gives. His Love is powerful, mighty, and awe inspiring.

His Love is a Crucifixion type of love.

So that's the challenge. To respond to His Love. To His light. To the blessed assurance that when we are amidst a storm and rocks are ahead, He is even there within and surrounding us in our peril.

So the next time I find myself in a moment in which declaring my trust in Him is natural and true, I will rejoice thoroughly. And the next time when such trust is painful, difficult, and next to impossible, like when the sun's light is hidden from me in the night or when a storm blocks the sun's rays, I will remember that the Son shines even when I cannot see Him, trillions of times brighter than the sun.

{ His Love burns for us, friends. So brilliantly. }